May, 2017
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Sensitive – Navigating Life Challenges
In nearly 15 years of working with folks, hearing their challenges, and seeing how they habitually interact with their triggers, I’ve noticed that there are common paths that keep coming up. On each path, people tend to face similar struggles and are supported in similar ways. I’ve decided to gather the advice Eloheim has consistently offered about each path and offer them here.
You may have traits from multiple paths; that’s ok! This is a new exploration for me. We will learn together how the paths intersect!
We will start with my own dominate personal path – The Sensitive
We will address the challenges The Sensitive faces in the following areas:
Safety
Emotional/Mental
Relationships
Energetic
Physical
We will also address the Eloheim tools that are most supportive to The Sensitive.
The Sensitive
Often referred to as psychic, Sensitives navigate the world able to pick up on the feelings, emotions, thoughts, worries, troubles, and moods of the people surrounding them. It is extremely common for Sensitives to have no idea that they are doing this. Sensitives are often overwhelmed and anxious without the ability to explain why. Their moods swing wildly based on their surroundings. This lack of grounding in the truth of one’s own feelings is typically extremely confusing and frightening.
It’s not all hard news. Sensitives are so aware of others they can often offer beautiful, targeted support to those they encounter. Their ability to read situations and meet unspoken needs make them very powerful connectors. Sensitives also delight in things in unusual ways which often brings joy to those around them.
Safety
Sensitives imagine they are safe if they know what’s going on around them. Ok, that’s a reasonable idea. However, Sensitives don’t limit it to “Did I lock the door?” or “Is it safe to walk to my car?” As an example, when a Sensitive is in a store, they likely don’t limit their check-in to just the person right in front of them (Are you a threat to me?), they are probably energetically checking-in with the entire store – products included – which is utterly overwhelming.
As you can probably imagine, crowds are a nightmare. Even small gatherings can be too much. And, to add to it, Sensitives often don’t set down those “energetic check-ins” when out of that person’s space. The check-ins continue to run – often for YEARS afterward. This is a huge drain on the body’s systems and totally unnecessary. The seeking of safety in this unhealthy way actually generates more challenge.
Emotional/Mental
Vast and quick mood swings can leave Sensitives feeling unbalanced and off center. They can enter a room feeling happy and be reduced to near tears without anything actually happening to them (other than picking up on the energy of the room). Locations and objects can also generate mood changes as Sensitives replay the experiences that others have had in those places and with those items. Sensitives perceive the feelings of other people so profoundly that they get confused as to what their own feelings are. I spent decades having feelings (anger/frustration/fear) that had no basis in my actual life yet were impossible to dismiss. I felt lost and alone.
Relationships
April, 2017
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I love my daughter but don’t really trust her – CASE STUDY
My 38 year old daughter is a long-time drug addict, a manipulator, and notably the mom of my 3 year old grandson. My grandson lives with my ex-husband but comes to me regularly for long weekends. My daughter comes here to be with her son under my watchful eye. She is still using and lying about it, and my grandson loves her dearly and needs to see her and be with her. I supervise the visits, though I am certain she would never do harm. Recently we believe she stole from us. My dilemma is not bringing more negative emotions into our environment. I am a kind person and don’t want to be otherwise. Yet her disease is impacting us.
It’s complex. She’s sick. It’s sad. I love my daughter but don’t really trust her. What is the most conscious way I can be around her and communicate with her?
Thank you so much for sharing such a big challenge.
Whenever children are involved it feels so much bigger and important. It’s tricky because your daughter is also your child. However, she is an adult and the focus really becomes your grandson. Is he at risk physically, mentally, or emotionally? If so, that must be the immediate priority. What I share below are options about how you can interact with your daughter differently once you know your grandson isn’t in any risk.
These thoughts come to me immediately:
Thanks to dictionary.com for the definition
You are helping to raise your grandson, that is kindness.
You are making it possible for your daughter to spend time with your grandson, that is kindness.
You are reaching out to Eloheim and me to find ways to improve your relationship with your daughter, that’s is kindness.
YOU ARE KIND
That doesn’t mean “anything goes” or “take what you want” or “treat me disrespectfully.”
They are not the same things.
Continue Reading…
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March, 2017
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I don’t understand my feelings – Case Study
It may be silly question, but how do I know what I feel? I sort of assume that what I feel is my feeling; why else I would feel it? I guess that most of the time I am lost in understanding what exactly I feel, have no idea how deep or shallow I should engage in it and what is important about it. My emphatic skills don’t make it any more simple.
This question really hits close to home. I spent decades completely overwhelmed by the feelings/emotions/energy of others. Some people call it empathic, psychic, or sensitive. Whatever you call it, I can experience the feelings of others and those feelings can mix with and override my awareness of my own truth. I never knew what to do about this, until Eloheim taught me.
I remember:
As a pre-teen, writing in my journal, “When the lead person I’m around is confident, I feel confident.”
As a teen, going to the shopping mall (that was a cool thing to do back then!) and being totally overwhelmed and not knowing why.
As a teen, paying hide-and-go-seek in the dark in the auditorium at church and being so utterly terrified that I couldn’t bear it any longer. Long-standing thanks to the unknown parishioner who seeing my distress, gave us a $20 bill so we could go get ice cream instead of playing hide-and-go-seek. That felt like a TON of money to me at the time and it was a shock that she would just give it to us. I remember looking into her concerned and kind eyes as she said, “Hey kids, how about ice cream!?” Of course this worked perfectly. Once I was away from a room filled with scared kids, I began to feel more normal.
As a young adult, going to a concert. We were having a great time sitting in the front row of the balcony. However, I felt an overwhelming urge to throw myself over the railing. So much so that I had to wind my feet and hands around the seat legs to stop myself.
As an adult, setting boundaries with someone, feeling their upset about my boundary setting so strongly that I backed down to get their upset to go away so I wouldn’t have to feel it anymore.
I could go on and on and on…
Now for the constructive aspects:
Case Study – Procrastination
Eloheim and I respond to real world examples of places that feel stuck and confusing for folks. My hope is that this will allow you to see how Eloheim’s teachings can work in your life!
Veronica,
Good morning!
You asked me 8 days ago to provide a brief blurb for a case study. Honored, in fact thrilled to have that invitation for greater connection, I agreed, and said I would send that to you by about a week ago.
I have been meaning to get to it every day. Of course I’m busy…in fact, in a way, that’s part of the issue I want to address, right? I know I could have chosen time to complete it regardless, but instead I just toyed mentally with different approaches to the paragraph, and procrastinated. Then got into one of those little vortices of resistance, feeling badly that I was not following through as promised, thinking about e-mailing to let you know, then: “Well if I’m going to do that, I might as well just hammer out that little paragraph first,” yet feeling like I wanted a relaxed, focused space to do that, which didn’t seem to be showing up.
Sorry not to have kept my word– not that you’re likely to mind terribly, but I do! And I will get to that few sentences, um… any day now!
Thanks so much for so generously sharing so much stellar material.
Love,
Susan
I replied
🙂 I think I should use just what you wrote here! It’s perfect.
It reminds me of way back when I had a business helping small business owners organize their offices. One of the most common comments was, “I will call you as soon as I clean up!” I said, “It’s better if I see it just as it is now so I can really see what’s going on!”
Susan replied:
Really? Wow, then I feel let off the hook! Almost too easy.
Happily,
Susan
I share the entire email exchange because it really shows the challenge
Needing to have it be “just right” (that perfectionism thing!) Being mean to self and perhaps the biggest challenge:
Not really knowing what the actual problem is
How do I Act on my Clarity – Case Study
Eloheim and I respond to real world examples of places that feel stuck and confusing for folks. My hope is that this will allow you to see how Eloheim’s teachings can work in your life!
One of my superhero powers is the ability to know things or to have clarity. My challenge has been with acting on my clarity. I have been looking at what focus and priority mean to me to strengthen my relationship to acting on my clarity that has helped a little. Acting on my clarity has been scary.
The concept that some folks don’t know how to be rich feels similar to how I feel, they win the lottery and then they are right back where they started a year later.
I have an abundance of clarity and Acting on my clarity requires energy, focus, commitment and responsibility. I have a few favorite familiar sufferings that I use to avoid moving forward with my clarity. One being using overwhelm to avoid focus and to avoid stretching myself.
Thank you for sharing!
I love your clarity about your clarity and about your stuck spot.
Case Study: I Want to Change Jobs (and More!)
Eloheim and I are going to respond to real world examples of places that feel stuck and confusing for folks. My hope is that this will allow you to see how Eloheim’s teachings can work in your life!
I work full time in a day job that I now hate. It is draining and they want more and more from me.
I recently certified as a coach as I love helping people towards their dreams. I have my own dreams as a singer but none of us are ready to tour and I don’t know how we would bring in money without live shows. So while I’m pursuing it as a dream, it wouldn’t be my livelihood.
I also have aging parents across the country and want to see them much more often.
My intention is to set up a coaching business from home which will give me the opportunity to travel (and still work with clients) and move from from my full time job to this.
The problem: We have a large amount of debt that we are faithfully paying down but it’s still big enough that I don’t know how to leave the day job soon enough. Any advice would be so wonderful.
Thanks for sharing!
I know this confusing pile of thoughts feeling so well! I even have an image I use to represent it!
All my noodles (thoughts) are mixed together and so confusing.
My first step is to lay out each thought individually. This helps calm me and also helps me catch Equal Signs. Equal Signs is Eloheim’s tool for noticing when we are connecting one thought (or outcome) to another habitually.
Continue Reading…
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